I have to work until about 7 today, but I’ll be available on d*scord, bc it should be super slow. So if anyone wants to plot or chat, add me! Or feel free to spam me with memes on here to answer tonight.
Okay, so tags are all done, drafts and inbox are cleared, the only thing I really have left to do is fix up/write out more of Bryan’s bio. I’ve gotta go shower though, then I’m going to watch Hold The Dark on Netfl*x because Jonathan is in it and I need to see it. I’ll be on d*scord though, if anyone wants to hit me up there. It’s indiebryan#7761.
The nightmares were getting worse. He’d only just arrived at Arkadia after there had been contact made and they’d been found wandering through Ice Nation; saved after four long months of fighting for their lives, needing to be alert every second, on edge for what might be around the next tree, what might be just behind that rock. Arkadia was safe though, and maybe that’s what was making the nightmares worse; instead of being alert, his guard was relaxing and it was making it easier for the nightmares to invade his brain.
Really, Bryan hadn’t even realized he’d dozed off. He’d been wandering around Arkadia and had found a spot to sit and lean against the ship, taking in the suns warmth and admiring earth now that he actually had a chance to do it. Before, they’d had only a brief second to admire the snow before being attacked, and then the months that followed, admiring anything the earth had was shoved far into the back of his mind. Couldn’t take in the beauty of earth when you were trying to stay alive, right? Somehow though, sitting there and enjoying the sun, safe within Arkadia’s fence, he’d dozed off.
The nightmare was one that had become normal for him; the replaying of what had happened in Ice Nation, and him being unable to do anything about it. He’d awoken to someone shaking him out of it, waking him and he realized he’d been crying and thrashing some against the ship where he was laying. The other man had pulled him quickly into his arms, and Bryan couldn’t help the sobs that were leaving him, clinging almost desperately to the other boy that was holding him.
“Hey, I’ve got you. It’s okay.”
The words were comforting, and Bryan couldn’t help but hide his face in his friend’s shoulder, trying to hide or wipe away the tears that were rolling down his cheeks. “I’m sorry,” he choked out then, unsure if he meant it just to the other boy, or in general, or to the ones lost in his nightmares, “I’m so sorry…”
“No,” Bryan’s voice was as stubborn as it was weak; the arrow in his leg he was sure had been laced with something, and it was becoming harder to walk. He knew that it was getting more difficult for Finn to help him, and he had to make the decision. He tugged at Finn’s arm to get him to stop, hiding them behind a tree and leaning on it. His time was up, but Finn’s didn’t have to be.
“You’re going to keep going, got it?” He stated, voice cracking a little, “You’re not out of time, Finn. All you have to do is get back to Arkadia. I’ll do what I can to distract them, but you keep going. Promise me, okay? Get back to the others and let them know what we saw. You have to…” Bryan’s hands were shaking as he put them on Finn’s arm, hoping the other would go, so at least one of them could make it back.
“Yeah, well it’s a good thing that we’re not beasts then,” Bryan stated, giving Finn a look, “Or at least, we can try to not act like we’re beasts, and we’re respectable human beings instead.” He sighed deeply, closing his eyes for a moment, before putting his hand on his friend’s arm. “Look,” He continued, “I get that you’re angry. But violence for violence isn’t the answer we need to be turning to. It’s just going to keep the cycle going, and is that really what you want? For people to continue to be in danger and hurt, because we had to focus on getting revenge?”
Bryan bit his lip, shaking his head a little and glancing off towards the others, working around the camp, chattering and a charge in the air, as if everyone were on edge and cautious. “I just…” He glanced back at Finn then, “I don’t think it’s the way we should handle this. Isn’t there some other way, you think? That maybe things can be peaceful? That we can all just… get along? Even… even with them. Maybe they’re not as bad as the others. Maybe Pike isn’t completely right, and there’s a chance…” He trailed off, voice getting soft.
“I’m rude. You know this. I’m an asshole. I tried to kill a guard, according to them.” Monroe laughed a little. “Nope.” She said. “Not anymore. Just farm Station.” She lead him towards the gym, honestly glad to have her friend back.
“You are, and I know this well. Also, I love you for it, but it doesn’t mean I’m not going to stop pouting about it, or teasing you about being rude,” Bryan laughed softly, before rolling his eyes at her words. “Farm Station. Wow, so I’ve got a whole station named after me? I must be pretty damn important,” He quipped innocently, following after her towards the gym.
Bryan couldn’t help but let out a faint, watery chuckle at Raven’s words. “If you’re wanting me to apologize for those absurd acts of chemicals, I’m not going to,” He stated gently. He knew the older girl was mad, that she hadn’t been happy at all about the fact that they’d returned from Farm Station, not with the hydrogenerator like promised, but with Riley and the others in tow instead. He knew that it was going to cause trouble and she wasn’t going to like it, but she hadn’t been there. She didn’t understand.
“Besides, it wasn’t just my chemicals,” He pointed out, trying to focus on that instead of the feeling of wanting to cry yet again, “though, I don’t know if reducing our friendships and relationships to absurd acts of chemicals is the best way to describe it. Even if it is just the chemicals, isn’t it also something much deeper and more complex? I care about all of my friends, including you, and that feels a little shallow saying it’s just the chemicals. I just… Raven, they’re our people. We couldn’t just walk away and leave them there. If I had been there, if it had been me, watching the others walk away while I was chained up, leaving me there to…”
He trailed off, unable to continue his sentence. For a long moment he was quiet, twirling the screwdriver he had in his hand absently, watching the other as she continued to work on whatever mechanical thing that she was working on. It was fascinating, and Bryan couldn’t help but be a little in awe of how simple and easy it seemed for her, when he couldn’t make heads or tails of it. He held the screwdriver out as she held out her hand for it, offering her a soft smile in hopes of getting one in return. He wanted to be helpful, and to maybe somehow reassure her that things were going to be okay.
“We have time,” He spoke up after a long moment, “We have you. Raven, you are one of the smartest people, the most brilliant people I know. And, I’m sure that’s not just an absurd act of chemicals in my brain talking about it, but rational ones. Because you are worth a thousand of me, of any of us. I’ll help you with whatever you need. I’ll do whatever you say. Just know that I trust you, that I trust all of us, and I know we can manage to make this work. All of us, all of our people, because even if it’s just chemicals, they’re the most important chemical acts. Because people are important.”
Monroe looked to the stairs, not wanting to risk getting in trouble. “ It doesn’t matter here. ” She said. “ You need to call me Sarah. If you don’t you’ll be beat. And you need to answer to James.”
“Why not?” Bryan asked, the frown on his face deepening as he listened to his words, “But my name isn’t James. Why would they want us to answer to different names? Or beat us? This… This isn’t right…” His hands trembled as she shook his head quickly.
indiebryan 